2009-05-24T07:34:00.003Z

Educashun Educashun edu er I'm off to the sun.

Well what do you know ? After a decade in which we have progressively educated an ever increasing percentage of our children we discover there is a lack of jobs. The degree in whatever, needs to be taken overseas or possibly into some form of slavery, oops internship, or even taking a post graduate gap year and helping some worth while cause in a jungle/swamp/desert with your new found knowledge of how to critique a Damien Hirst Art work, or which is the best soap opera for doing the ironing to.

Gotta love the socialisation of the educashun system.

2009-04-14T07:09:00.002Z

I like a drink.
The Government tries to tell me that my like is somewhat injurious to my health, I do not have the 'expertise' of the Governments Health department to substantiate any counter claim, so I ignore their advice. I was mindlessly surfing when I saw this on the BBC Bloody Hell Now I Am Going to Get Throat Cancer Too

Well from that article I think I may well want to move to Japan, 25 units a week a light drinker 12 or 13 pints a week, not too bad a couple of pints on the way home from work :)
50 UNITS is a moderate drinker by the Japanese standard, that I think approaches normality, whereas here that makes you a raving alchy.

I think I will have a couple of my weekly allowance tomorrow when I get off :)

Later

2009-02-24T08:58:00.004Z

Somewhat miffed, I just read that the Air Traffic Controllers are going on Strike on Thursday, my relief is over a week late, no fault of his family bereavement, and is supposed to get here on Friday morning.
I really hope the strike does not come about.

FIRST FIST

2007-02-01T03:34:00.002Z

How the FIST Came About

Some time ago, there was an Audit, the Rig was expected to score 100%, or heads would roll. Money was no object, at least up to $3.50, and all the resources required would be made available to us, as long as they were already on the rig or could be hand carried by the next Expat coming through Murtala Mohammed Airport, without being caught.

I think some history is required to allow the reader to contextualise the loss of respect which occurred, if only in my delusional rantings.

The Company has a list of, shall we say, 'Prime Directives' which we as minions must adhere to, while management on the beach must be seen to adhere to.

F - Fiscal Diligence
I - Indupitable Probity
R - Respect
S - Security
T - Technological Excellence

Unalterable, carved in stone (possibly literal), foundations for us to go forth and do our business on. Then came the slump, not a biggie, but day rates were down, cash was short, blind eyes abounded around cut corners, the audit was still coming, but, and there is always a but, the rumours started. The word came down form on high,
'100% while still something to strive for was, perhaps, in the current climate a little ambitious, 80% would be an excellent result.' (and would ensure enough Brownie points for management to collect their annual bonuses.)

And so the race was on, which of the Prime Directives must go, when 100% is expecting too much and 80% is acceptable it is obviously not Fiscal Diligence. Can't get rid of that 20%, money is the bottom line, we cannot afford to lose the respect of the financial markets, ooh what would happen if our Standard and Poors or our Moody ratings take a hit, nope lets leave that one alone. Whats next? Indupitable Probity, ah shit if we get caught lieing to the Oil Companies or our Suppliers we would lose their respect, and possibly more importantly their business and our means to do business, I guess we had best keep this one as well.

Hmmm number 3, Respect I think we will come back to this one it appears to be mentioned in the previous two already, we appear to have some respect already. The financial people are happy we have reduced spending and the oil companies and suppliers have not caught us in any blatant lies, so lets move on to 4.

Security, damn we have to have it, we are an international company and some of the places we send our people to are not safe, some of the counties they work out of are almost as dangerous. No we need a good security record or the wimpy Oil Companies get scared of law suits. Got to have this one, it also allows us some respect for getting people to work 'difficult' conditions and allows us to screw a few dollars extra from the Oil Companies with no risk of losing respect.
Finally we have Technological Excellence, can we live with out this ? Er I think not we are pushing this quite heavily and with a Price premium attached to the New and Shinies we have dotted about, best keep this on the front page, it also garners a touch more respect for us if we can drill in places the competition can't, well at least until their new big and shinies come out.

Looks like we can lose the Respect, we get it with all the other planks of our Prime Directive and our mission statement is vague enough that losing Respect does not impact upon it.

So there it is

F. Fiscal Diligence
I. Indupitable Probity
S. Security
T. Technological Excellence

a trimmed down set of Prime Directives we can give to the work force at our leisure.

FIST on

FIST ON

FIRST FIST